12 Sex toys you can disguise if your kids discover them

12 Sex toys you can disguise if your kids discover them | Beanstalk Mums

Ok, sex toys. They are wonderful … but in the wrong hands can be a tinsy bit embarrassing. And with kids in the house, with inquisitive minds and sticky beaks, the chances of your buzzy toy being revealed and waved around for all to see, is higher than you might like.

Don’t let that stop you having the fun you deserve though! Outwit your little ones by choosing sneaky sex toys that can pass as a different inanimate object.

It’s all about getting creative, and we’ll give you a head start with our list of sex toys you can disguise if your kids discover them.

SEX TOYS YOU CAN DISGUISE IF YOUR KIDS DISCOVER THEM

WOMANIZER X LOVEHONEY PRO 40

You can leave this one anywhere without fear, just be careful … someone might actually use it. Shaped like a sleek ear thermometer, the Womanizer X by Lovehoney combines gentle suction with pulsations to stimulate the clitorus, with six intensity levels to slowly build up to the O.

WOMANIZER X LOVEHONEY PRO 40 | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Lovehoney

LOVEHONEY FLASH 7 FUNCTION RECHARGEABLE CLITORAL VIBRATOR

For the ultimate discretion, get this vibe that looks uncannily like a USB drive. It has 7 functions, is super quiet, waterproof, travel-friendly and plugs right into a charging port or laptop. This would be perfect if it could store porn too!

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Lovehoney

CRAVE VESPER VIBRATOR NECKLACE

When it comes to sex toys you can disguise, a necklace vibrator just perfect. Talk about ‘in ya face’! It’s elegant, dramatic and goes with everything. Wear this Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace to a fancy dinner, then pop off for some personal fun later. No one will be any the wiser.

Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Adult Toy Megastore

MAGIC WAND VIBRATOR

Surely it’s a back massager? Well actually you can use it as one! The Magic Wand Vibrator is a powerful, multifunctional stimulator for any body part (great for solo play and for couples) and makes a wonderful massager for sore muscles. We recommend this colourful metallic version.

 

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Lovehoney

HIDE & PLAY LIPSTICK VIBRATOR

What’s a portable piece of plastic that should be in every woman’s purse? A Hide & Play Lipstick Vibrator, of course. At only 3.25 inches, this bullet stimulator is ideal for travel and on-the-go pleasure. It’s hypoallergenic and features 8 types of vibrations.

Hide & Play Lipstick Vibrator | Beanstalk MumsStockist: Adult Toy Megastore

SEX TOYS THAT LOOK LIKE EVERYDAY OBJECTS (CONT.)

OVO S5 RECHARGEABLE LAY ON STIMULATOR

A vibrator that looks anything but, the Ovo S5 Lay On Stimulator is almost too ergonomic for words. But don’t be fooled, this one packs powerful vibrations that you can control for targeted pleasure. ‘Goodness, what is mummy’s computer mouse doing in my bed?.

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Adult Shop

ELIXIR PLAY – APHRODITE

Feel like role playing in the bedroom tonight? The Aphrodite is the perfect accessory. The red heart is slightly bigger than a regular necklace pendant and matches raunchy maid/nurse/schoolgirl outfits. Comes with a remote if you want your partner to take control.

Elixir Play Aphrodite | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Adult Toy Megastore

MANTRIC CLITORAL VIBE

Don’t you love multipurpose sex toys? The sleek Mantric Clitoral Vibe is powerful, quiet and guarantees an erotic Zen experience. And the best bit is: It doubles up as ‘mummy’s lucky pebble’ if it finds its way into prying, little hands.

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Lovehoney

HOT SHOT

Is it Alexa? Is it a speaker? No, it’s a cleverly concealed fleshlight! Perfect for couples, Lovehoney’s Hot Shot is a male masturbator that warms up and mimics the sensations of the mouth. Need we say more?

HOT SHOT | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: LoveHoney

DRAGONZ TALE BEADED CORD ANAL BEADS

If the kids ask, tell them it’s an adult fidget spinner. These Dragonz Tale Anal Beads are more titillating than soothing, but whatever. The beads are graduated in size so you can practice and get used to the sensations … great for both beginners and experienced users.

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk MumsStockist: Femplay

THE BEST SEX TOYS THAT DON’T LOOK LIKE SEX TOYS (CONT.)

SEVEN ELEVEN ELEGANT DILDO

Sex toy designers are a wacky bunch. The Seven Eleven (that name tho) looks like a part that fell off the car or something out of Star Trek porn. Don’t be intimidated by the stainless steel, the label says it’s very comfortable and smooth for female G-Spot or male prostate stimulation.Seven Eleven Elegant Dildo | Beanstalk MumsStockist: Adult Toy Megastore

LOVEHONEY GLASS DILDO

This futuristic, hand-blown tentacle Glass Dildo is almost to beautiful to keep hidden away in mummy’s private toy drawer. An elegant ornament to adorn the most grand of mantlepieces and a brilliant conversation opener. Perfect for ladies who like it big.

Sex Toys You Can Disguise | Beanstalk Mums

Stockist: Lovehoney

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Unsure about which vibrator is right for you? Enjoy this read: Beginners guide to buying a vibrator.

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