Mums are unique and are the same across the globe. They are crazy. They are loving. They are protective. But above all, they are the pillars you can hold onto whenever you need. But, in some cases, mums can be difficult parents!
Mothers are the most protective, beautiful and ferocious creatures any of us could ever know. As the younger generation, you may need to figure out how to deal with the highest level of crazy.
I’ll tell you a little something about my ma.
My mother is pretty awesome; she thinks she’s always right and she knows everything about the universe. Like, literally. She screams at me for being imperfect. However, I’m the kind of person who always rebelled. You can imagine how it used to be.
However, over the past few years, I tried out a few experiments to figure out how to effectively deal with parents without too much tension.
Let’s look into my thoughts, shall we?
BEFORE: PLANNING IS A MUST IF YOU WANT TO HANDLE TENSE SITUATIONS
Take any tense situation in your life like, coming out to her or being broke. You know exactly how she will react, I presume. So, plan it out. Strategise your moves and go with the flow of your plan.
WHAT YOU CAN DO?
You need to understand your mother. She cares about you more than anything in the world. This is probably why you’re terrified of facing her. Right? All you need to do is plan out your moves, your statements, everything! Then, you need to go smooth on her. Probably, you can start with small talk, ask her how her day went. Then, shoot her with the crazy information you have in store for her! This way, you can give her the shock in a subtler way.
PRO TIP: Do let her know that you love her and care for her. You need her to be a part of your life. Which is why, you’re telling her in the first place!
DURING: WHEN YOU FEEL IT’S NOT WORTH FIGHTING WITH YOUR MOTHER
There must have been multiple times when you feel that the generation gap is too big for your mother to understand you. Remember, that is never the case. Your mother will always love you, come what may. However, sometimes, it’s best to let go.
WHAT YOU CAN DO?
If a fight or a series of fights come up, don’t get worked up. Keep calm and I assure you that your calm face and a smile from within will definitely calm her down. You can also change the topic if you really feel it’s not worth fighting with your mother at that point. You need to ensure your issues with your mother are sorted. So, deal with it like a mature human!
PRO TIP: It’s good to let things go. Make sure you don’t forget to clear the air soon. She’s the only one who’s going to be by your side no matter what. Remember that always. By letting go, I don’t mean forgetting the discussion; it’s more about getting back to it when everyone’s calm and you can begin the discussion again.
LATER: TALK IT OUT
I understand that it’s hard for you to go back to a sensitive topic. You need to understand that you cannot ignore this one woman in your life. Remember to keep one end goal in mind while communicating with your mother, ‘Your relationship with your mother is more important than picking a winner for the fight!’
WHAT YOU CAN DO?
Sit with your mother in the living room or some private place. Talk to her and let her know what you choose to do and why. Be very clear and straight. Console her while if cries. Remember, it’s all momentary and it will pass.
PRO TIP: Keeping communication channels open with your mother is great. If you Skype her maybe once a week, giving her difficult news can get easier. She won’t feel left out or feel like a terrible mother. Keep in touch with her and love her. Only she can give you more than you are giving and you know that.
The day you’ll be able to deal with your mother, I assure you, you can run the biggest of companies. She’s the trainer you can never find anywhere else.
Here’s my theory: Probably, mums drive us crazy because they want to ensure that we are strong enough to deal with the real world!
Let’s love mummy.