What can you do about parental alienation when it’s actually by the ex mil? Before I left my ex I spoke to legal aid and they said I don’t have a say in who looks after my kids when they are in their Dad’s care. My sensitive 4 yo is now telling me things (she tried with my oldest before I left). Tonight he started crying and said ‘I don’t want anyone to take me away from you’. Of course, I was a bit shocked and asked who told you that? ‘Grandma is saying bad things again. She said she is going to take me away from you’. He also said ‘Grandma said …. an idiot’ (his brother). My 3 yo also told me ‘Grandma said you’re an idiot Mum’!! I left ex over a year ago so normally I just tell the kids people say silly things sometimes and don’t listen to her. But I feel a little sick about the first comment and wondering if I should speak to a lawyer. I have no one to back me up, ex won’t believe me about her manipulation (that’s why I left in the first place) and ex mil is so good at gas lighting. Oh, and no proof. Did anyone deal with parental alienation successfully? Thanks
You need to read amy baker or some other book on parental alienation. People will tell you not worry kids work it out for themselves but that’s just wishful thinking. I don’t know that your mil could seriously alienate your kids without your exes help but if he doesn’t see what his mother is doing then if your kids started to reject you he might not step up to back you up and stop his mother. Baker’s book coparenting with a toxic ex has some strategies for ways to respond to alienation techniques that don’t do further damage to the kids or your relationship with them. Good luck. I’m mildly alienated from my eldest daughter while I’m still living full time with her and so scared to leave my dysfunctional relationship in case he turns my other kids against me.